I talk a lot about waiting. It’s probably because it’s one of the things I struggle with the most. Like seriously WHO LIKES WAITING!? I’ve begged the Lord so many times to break me of impatience, but he’s not a magic genie. We don’t get 3 wishes & *POOF!* They’re granted. He’s a God that gives freely & righteously, but there’s also a method to His work. I think sometimes the way He helps us through our shortcomings is by placing us in situations where we can only rely on faith to get us through.
My husband Ian & I have been waiting 2 looooooonnngggg weeks for the results of a genetic blood panel we requested for the baby we’re expecting. It tests for all sorts of neural tube defects, chromosome abnormalities, & genetic disorders. We love this little Jellybean SO MUCH that we just want to be prepared for what’s to come. Earlier this week we got news from our Dr. that the results came back from the panel & it turns out, the sample they took contained “insufficient fetal DNA.” We have little to no idea what that means, just that we have to take the test again & wait another 2 weeks. The Lord really had my number on this one. I asked for opportunity to work on my patience, & BOY HOWDY am I getting it.
I’m frustrated, worried, anxious, uneasy, & impatient to name a few things I’m feeling. Every step of this pregnancy has been a new struggle & it feels like all I’m doing is waiting. Waiting for test results, waiting for the Dr. to call, waiting for good news, waiting for the baby to get bigger & stronger, waiting to feel that first glorious kick from inside. But the thing about waiting that we forget too easily is that while we’re waiting, we’re giving our God time to craft miracles. And we can’t rush that, can we?
I’m trying to be more patient, but I’ll be the first to admit– it’s really really hard. It makes it even harder when we feel like we’re being beat down over & over again by bad news & struggle & things aren’t going the way we imagined. But according to the Scriptures, we can have faith that what God is holding behind His back is better than what’s in front of us. Waiting doesn’t have to be so agonizing if we set our focus on His provision rather than what we think we’re lacking. He knows what we need better than we do, we just have to wait for it.
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