We are on the hunt for a church home after recently moving across the country. It’s been such a crazy time for our family, so full of crossroads and decisions. We are fairly certain we’ve landed on the place the Lord wants us to stay for a season, but there’s a little voice in the back of my mind that’s giving me all sorts of trouble. She is ultra concerned with what folks will say or think or say, or… say. Small town life is a delicate balance of comfy familiarity and knowing too much of everyone’s business. If I’m honest with myself, then I’ll admit that this is both beautiful in my eyes and also terrifying. I do a double take any time someone looks at me even a little bit cock-eyed or whispers to a friend as I enter the room. I want people to like me. We all do, right? I want people to approve of who I am and what I’m doing. It’s just human nature, and it’s silly.
True to form, the Lord is spot on with all that’s going on in my heart, and our new church has been in a series about people pleasing. Let’s all take a moment and roll our eyes and beat our heads against the wall, because we’ve heard it all before, right? I’m embarrassed at how convicting it’s all been for me.
Last week I made a pretty fantastic discovery. The tiny pre-punched syllabus that is handed out each week fits in my Praise Book! I have started journaling a page when things stand out, and I had to start with all the crazy things God is working in my heart through this tough church-change-fiasco season. The pastor said two things that stood out huge to me, and I’ll be pondering them for a while. First, he talked about the trap that we fall into, that allows others to limit our success. Worrying too much about people’s opinions puts a ceiling on the call of God on our life. I had never thought of it that way, that allowing others to put limits on me, actually limits the work God can do through my life. And it leads right into my favorite quote from that Sunday, “Normal is rarely godly. Do life to the rhythms of God.” Y’all, I needed to hear this, all of it, but especially this. I am not normal. I’d like to think that I slide into social situations without being noticed, and breeze right through sprinkling awesomeness on everyone that comes in contact with me. But no. I’m awkward, and a weirdo mostly. I look at life through a set of eyes that few can understand and it makes things hilarious a whole lot. If I try to squeeze myself into the mold, my quirks come oozing out in all sorts of ugly and I’m no good to the kingdom that way. God made me in His image. He made me to love people in a really specific way. He was so intentional with the personality and temperament He gave me.
I like to think that the complexity of God is part of why diversity is so beautiful. God never asked me to be normal. He never asked me to be just like you. He asked me to be faithful to His plan, and that means that the person I am right this second is useful for His purpose. I want to be a fancy smancy colorful flamingo in a world of boring ole’ pigeons, don’t you?
Illustrated Faith by Bella Blvd Praise Book | Illustrated Faith by Bella Blvd Words designer clips | Illustrated Faith by Bella Blvd Be Bold Bible mat | Illustrated Faith by Bella Blvd .65 precision pen | Illustrated Faith by Bella Blvd die cuts ‘encouragement’ | Illustrated Faith by Bella Blvd die cuts ‘animals’ | Illustrated Faith by Bella Blvd Genesis Kit wordfetti black | Illustrated Faith by Bella Blvd homespun one in a melon | Illustrated Faith by Bella Blvd typed one in a melon (genesis collection) | Illustrated Faith by Bella Blvd enamel hearts she blooms | apple barrell acrylic paints in cameo pink, peony pink, wild iris, cloudless, tropic orange, acapulco, and black